Archive for October 7th, 2008

Sheep is Sorry for Being Rude

Posted by: Ms Ayain Ms Aya's Papers

Oct

Mood - Disappointed with self

7th October 2K8, Tuesday – 4:34+pm.

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Just now in the cab, the taxi driver asked me, “Where are your friends?”.

I didn’t answer at first until he asked me again. After debating with myself whether to answer, I shook my head and said, “They’re not here”. I was about to say that I don’t have any friends here but — who will believe that? (Laughs)

Besides, it will kill the conversation. <_ _>lll

“You’re alone?”, he continued.

“Sort of…”, I smiled.

“That’s lonely…”, he muttered.

He asked where I come from and I told him that I live around here. After that, there was an awkward silence between us and I could tell that he didn’t want to prod me with personal questions.

Indeed, I lived here for 2 years+ and I don’t have any companions to hang out with. Why is that so? Well, we’ll get to that part later. <-___->

As I was saying, he dropped me off at my destination and I hung around the shopping complex for a while.

Just when I was exiting the complex, I saw a group of familiar people ahead of me. I looked closely and immediately recognized them.

“Uh-oh… Students from the English centre”, I gulped. <O_O>lll

One of them spotted me and alarmed the rest. <≥.≤>

Panicking, I quickly walked pass them with a slight smile on my face, hoping that I was invisible. I wasn’t worried about getting caught because by far, nobody has ever stopped me from walking away. <- ->

However…

Just when I was about to get to the cab, one of the student stopped me. <_ _>lll

He asked if I remembered him and how am I. I definitely remember him because he was my student and — he’s a Japanese. <^x^>/

Anyway, there was a long pause before I answered.

The next thing I know, I was in the cab — leaving the premises.

Did I say good bye after he said “Take care?”.

Did I even wish him well before I left?

… <u_u>

Sadly, no… I did not.

That’s why I’m so mad at myself right now that I’m thinking of eating a tub of beans to my death.

It’s not that I didn’t like him and wanted to be rid of him. In fact, he is a nice and polite person whom I really want to get to know.

But stupid me who got controlled by fear started to panic and as a result, I did not only create a bad image of myself but also made him look silly in front of the others.

I behaved like a fool and very unfriendly towards him although it wasn’t my intention. He and the students are probably developing a lousy impression of me as I’m typing this now. (Cries)

Baa… Perhaps the next time I see him, I shall apologize to him for being rude and unfriendly. That’s if — I don’t panic and run away again. <;__;>

Also, suppose a taxi driver ever ask me whether I’m alone or where are my friends, I’ll answer with honesty, “I’m too much of a shit load to deserve good friends”.

<u_u,> *Sniff*

With that said, you now understand that this is a shameful and stupid sheep writing to you.